#32 - Scorpions - Blackout

So I have this thing. This thing is that if you can't appreciate Whitesnake, the Scorpions, and "Rainbow in the Dark," I'm not sure if we can ever really see eye-to-eye about music. They're not the most poetic of creative endeavors, but good lord, how they do rock.

I tend to avoid greatest hits compilations. I find it a necessarily evil sometimes, especially with bands from the pre-LP days, where the collecting and remastering aspects of the packages make them worth it. Whenever I see greatest hits discs for bands like Black Sabbath, Judas Priest and Iron Maiden, I giggle. I can't imagine having an Iron Maiden collection and missing out on "22 Acacia Avenue" or a Black Sabbath best-of and not being able to hear "Planet Caravan."

However, I think the Scorpions might fall into the category of a band where it makes sense. Some of my fondest memories of listening to the radio as a kid consist of rocking out in the car to "No One Like You" and "Big City Nights" while my dad stared on in horror. I couldn't help it, I dug the stuff. It was ballsy, well-produced, and catchy as hell. But after listening to Blackout, generally considered the band's breakout album, I wonder if they really were able to stretch it out over the span of a record.

Perhaps I'm just so attuned to it from the aforementioned headbanging as a twelve-year-old, but apart from the classic "No One Like You," I really didn't find anything I enjoyed at all on Blackout. It doesn't have to do with Klause Meine's hilarious delivery ("I've missed you since I've been awieeeeee" and "If I had a choice I would stiieeeeee") or the inherent bloatedness of the whole thing, but there just really aren't that many good songs here.

Even the self-titled Whitesnake album had at least five pretty great songs on it, and they spent most of their time aping Led Zeppelin; but they were able to draw it out over multiple tracks, which the Scorpions just couldn't do on Blackout. I have a soft spot for total cheese-dick rock like this, so maybe I'll warm up to it later on, but even after being in the mood to totally rock out, bro-style, Blackout didn't do a whole lot for me.

"No One Like You" live at the storied US festival